Texting vs. Talking

26 04 2010

There is no doubt that text messaging can be, in the right situations, the most efficient, convenient form of communication ever invented.  It’s genius.

However, there is a tremendous amount of doubt about whether, on the whole, it actually improves human communication, especially among young people.  Many people feel that it is stunting the development of a variety of communication skills in teens.  And it’s not just the naysayers who don’t understand the technology who are skeptical about the long-term effects of heavy texting.  It’s the early adopters, the ones who have been text messaging a lot for a long time who are concerned.

NPR put together a nice report which succinctly describes the situation.  While it doesn’t offer solutions, it does provide a clear snapshot of where we are with this mostly youth-driven phenomenom.

Listen here to the 4 minute mp3 file NPR report on Texting Teens.

Here’s a few thoughts on texting etiquette for adults and teens (click here).

Other ideas (not all good for every situation):

  • Don’t give your preteen a texting cell phone.  Wait as long as possible.
  • Have a cell phone docking station (basket or box on a shelf) in the kitchen where kids dock their phones for meal time, family time, bed time, and any time that you want some text-free time.
  • Have an “electronic sabbath” as a family, in which everybody stays unplugged for a certain number of hours.  Try a whole day sometime.  Read more at the blog post “Do You Need a Digital Sabbath.”
  • Try to avoid multi-tasking so much.  Research is proving that it doesn’t work well, even though you think it does.  Encourage kids to mono-task: do one thing at a time well.
  • Have kids pay their own cell phone bill.  Or compromise: they pay for texts and data service.
  • Use texting as a tool of encouragement.  Make it a ministry of love — for birthdays especially.
  • Use texting to encourage others to vote on election day or to pray for  or do something for someone in great need.
  • Make a rule that you cannot text someone in the same room or house.
  • LEAVE A COMMENT IF YOU HAVE ANOTHER IDEA.

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Categories : Adolescence, Technology

Youth Sports is a Means to a Greater End

20 04 2010

Every parent of an athletic child wonders if their kid has a shot at the big time.  Well, let’s look at some hard facts related to this question. Just 2 percent of varsity high school athletes will play their sport in college, and only 1 percent will get a scholarship to do so.  Let’s take basketball as an example.  Roughly 1 basketball player from all the athletes from 8 high school teams will get a scholarship.  How many high school basketball players make it to the professional level?  0.03% Yes, that is 3 in 10,000 who make an income playing basketball.  Far less will make the big money in the NBA.  And very few of them play for very long.  The truth of the matter is brutal.  9,997 varsity high school players don’t ever make any money playing basketball; 3 do.  Of those three, two will earn about $40,000 a year in a foreign league until younger players replace them in about five years.  1 in 10,000 will gain some fame and fortune playing ball.

So kids may dream of playing pro ball, but it’s a fantasy for all but a very, very, very few who are extraordinarily talented, extremely hardworking, and exceedingly fortunate to avoid injuries and be seen by the right people at the right time.

So, is it foolish to pursue excellence in sports in high school?  Absolutely not!  But it’s essential that student athletes understand that sports is a great teacher, but it’s a lousy employer (because it isn’t hiring).  Athletics is a means, not an end.  It can teach young people valuable lessons and instill noble character traits that are extremely useful in their careers and in their relationships.

But too many kids and parents are burdened with the belief that they can do it.  They will be the next LeBron James, Roger Federer, or Albert Pujols.  I say “burdened” because the overwhelming evidence says that they will not achieve anywhere near that level of success.  And the result is a young life that is very often ultra-competitive, over-scheduled, and hyper-stressed.   Burnout is common.  Injuries can be severe (torn ACL’s and rotator cuffs among preteens are not unusual now).  Resentment often looms ahead.

Stephen Durant is an expert in youth sports, and his book Whose Game Is It, Anyway? has some excellent advice for parents and coaches of great young athletes.

1.  “Emphasize the development of virtue and character over scoreboard outcome. The development of a good character — the ability to control passion, emotion, and behavior — will always stand children in good stead on and off the playing field… Children, at any talent level, can only be truly successful in life if they possess good character.  Becoming an emotionally balanced person of courage, fairness, self-discipline, and strong ability to work as a member of a team, sets up a person for success in any endeavor, in any place” (Durant).

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Categories : Adolescence, Athletics, Education, Parenting, Social Development

Our Friend, Failure

8 04 2010

I once heard a speaker named Dan Miller at an educator’s conference tell the audience about how he learned to fly an airplane.  First, you should know that he is disabled from polio as a teenager to the extent that he can only use one arm, and he walks with a serious limp.  His sickness had canceled his first flying lesson; becoming a pilot was his childhood dream.

In his autobiography, he admits that “Planes require two good hands and two good legs to work the controls, yokes, radio, and rudder pedals.  ‘Airplanes crash,’ they would say.  ‘You’ll kill yourself.’  ‘You only have one good arm.’ ‘Your legs are too weak.’  I heard a lot of dream-breaker statements… My first lesson was awful!  I had to reach across my body for the flaps, throttle, and trim.  Every time I’d reach for them, the plane would dip, tip, and do everything but fly straight and level.  I went all over the sky.  I couldn’t fly.  My lesson was a total failure.  But I could give up on my dream yet… The next try, though still not good, was better.  I tell people, ‘If it worth doing, it’s worth doing poorly at first.’

Dan eventually got his pilot’s license and has enjoyed many years of flying adventures.  He also taught himself to play golf with only one arm, and he’s good.  He scores in the mid-80′s regularly and has a hole-in-one to his credit.  Impressive.

Anything worth doing well is worth doing poorly at first.  That is wisdom for all ages.  We need to embrace failure as a friend who is honest enough to tell us that we still need to work harder, listen to others, think more clearly, and learn more information. Failure has something to teach us every time.  That’s what makes people successful — learning from mistakes and persevering slowly toward the goal.

Consider this…

Whether it’s a left-handed layup, a math problem, or a new technological skill, kids need to be encouraged to do things poorly at first, then a little better each time, until they make real progress.  Then encourage them some more.  “See! I knew you could do it! You have improved so much! I’m proud of you. Really proud.”

Try it.

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Categories : Adolescence, Discipline, Resiliency, Self-Discipline

Healthy Adults, Healthy Kids

4 04 2010

Being healthy as an adult will yield both direct and indirect benefits for the kids in your care.  Take care of yourself, for their sake.

This video is thought-provoking and interesting, even if you think you know everything about being healthy.

Here’s proof that we need help in this area:  Super-Fatty Menu Items


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Categories : Education, health, Physical Development


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